| | I've learned a lot this past week. The most important thing I learned is how much my friends and family mean to me. I already knew I was a daddy's girl and I knew I loved my momma. But, my extended family has been so good to me this past week.
I am a stubborn, willful, strongly opinionated girl. I know this. I admit this and sometimes I feel bad about this... What I am not is an emotionally strong girl. I am a wimp!!!! Huge wimp. I can go into a situation resolved in knowing what I need to do and resolved not to break down... but rest assured that if my loved ones are involved or my loved ones, loved ones are involved I will break down. If you need someone to be strong for someone else... I am not your girl.
I am also regrettably not always the most sympathetic person in the world either. Sometimes I can be the sort of person who thinks life is life and you just have to deal with it and move on... period. And that's true but I could still be a little more sympathetic. But, you know... once you've been there it's hard not to empathize with someone because you know what it's like. I wish experience wasn't such an important part of my learning process... but it is. Sometimes I get scared just thinking what God might want to teach me next. I want to learn things the easy way.
Wednesday morning I went to the hospital with my dad thinking I would bring him home that evening and he'd be out in the yard building something the next day... instead, as you know, he ended up having a quadruple bypass on Thursday. My mother was having back trouble at the same time and wasn't really able to get around. So, when I went to bed Wednesday night I thought I was going to end up at the hospital by myself waiting while my dad, my champion had his surgery. And I just told you, I'm not an emotionally strong person. I had no idea how I was going to get through that by myself. I may have, at that time, also had a few words with God about my not having a husband to be next to me... clearly God didn't think a husband is necessary. God is never wrong and perhaps, I needed to be more trusting in Him.
Thursday morning I got up to get ready to go to the hospital and I called my mother. She was feeling well enough to go... which is good because it would have been extremely hard on her not to be there. So, that was a miracle that the pain was such that she could sit up and get there. Then when we got there we found my aunt and uncle from out of town already sitting in the waiting room. Then about 30 mins later another aunt showed up and then a cousin and then another uncle. My little niece had tubes put in that morning but my brother's family drove down too. And tons of people from my parents' church were there. I went from being completely alone to being surrounded by people. We took up half the waiting room. And friends offered to drive in from out of town (Thanks KAG and Spunky) other friends called to check on me and called each other to check on me. My coworkers brought us food which at first I didn't think was necessary but then it turned out to be such a huge blessing not to have to worry about dinner. I'm telling you, I have never ever been so grateful to those people who took the time to care about me while I was waiting and the people who called or emailed me later to see how my dad was and if there was anything they could do.... I just had no idea what it all would mean. And I hope to be as good of friend to those people as they were to me. Now I know how much it means just for someone to be there.
My dad is supposed to get to come home tomorrow. It blows my mind a bit that a few days ago there was a man that cracked open my dad's chest and cut on his heart... and now he is coming home. How can that be possible? The doctors say that everything has gone really well. My dad's heart is healthy because they caught the problem before he had a heart attack. But if you ask my dad... he says he's not sure the surgery was worth it... and my dad is not a complainer. I'm glad he's coming home and I hope each day he will feel better and better so that he will think it was worth it. It was worth it to me... but then no one stuck their hands in my chest and moved my organs around. Still I am very very grateful that he had the surgery and is getting better. I love that man.
Thank you all for your prayers and your concern... it really meant the world to me. |
| | Posted 7/14/2008 8:21 PM - 85 Views - 6 eProps - 3 comments
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